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Health & Fitness

Single, Tired & Confused "Begin Here"

By: Kenneth Stepp


There are moments when something looks so enormous that must be done, that I throw up my hands and say, “I don’t know where to begin”. Anything in life worth doing, has this element to it. It’s important, it’s big, it must be done. Tasks are slave masters until we get them under control. Our love life, emotions, and things that motivate us are no different. I believe they may be more tangible. Depends on your view.


Times are what they are. The confusion makes us tired. It brings us to a low spot. We can actually get stuck there for a while. I did. Sometimes diving in at something cures that for me. My quest, our goal, has never changed. I doubt many of us change that very much. We may take a break, I get that. But, the prize stays the same. I long to stare into her eyes, and know her.

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A while back, I met a girl for lunch. We had a great conversation. Maybe 3 hours worth. Great food, service, and we both smiled a lot. After that, we just kind of got busy. Although we both vowed we wanted a second date, flirted afterwards by text and messages. Life happened, and our schedules clashed. We lost track of one another for months. I was back on an online dating site for almost 2 weeks before I couldn’t take it anymore. During that time, she sent me a message on it. Can we do lunch tomorrow? I said, of course. Again, had great conversation, food, and lots of laughter. It was a “maybe” moment. It actually did wind up nowhere. but we are friends now. A friend is a great thing. How did that happen. Our original beginning failed for whatever reason. Instead of dwelling on the past loss. She decided to start over again with me. Today. We enjoy the win. Worth taking a shot on beginning where you are.


New beginnings are still beginnings. If you are searching for where to begin your search for a partner. “Begin where you are”. The starting line to your journey is where you feet, phone, and email are right now. I have met amazing girls along the way. If I was dating, or wanted to date. I would look to them first. The psycho soup I encountered so often online was not a bowl of cherries at all. I met some crazies. But, I met some wonderful ones along the way as well. My theory of begin here, means one doesn’t have to look forward or backwards. Look where you stand first. You know your present. You know those in your orbit. Search your heat. Are you ready to build? To love again? If this question resonates in your heart. You probably are. Is life better with a partner in crime? Then find your felon baby.

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Inevitably a girl (my readers are mostly girls) will email me saying she felt I was speaking directly to her. Maybe the universe works that way. I encourage others to take that risk. Open your heart and let some sunshine in. It feels great (said the pot calling the kettle black). I vacillate every day if I am ready to expose myself to that again. It varies from moment to moment many days. Tough call. But one I feel closer to making all the time. Do you?


Wanting more is a human condition. Accepting less is for cowards afraid of the emotional risk of going for more. In my risk management course. I failed. I would risk everything on almost nothing. So, risking my exposed heart again will happen. The reward is too big. It is the reason I wake up every day. It is the most important thing in my life. To find “Her”. My forever. I’ve had some speed bumps along the way. Met some awesome people, learned so much about my fellow humans too. Was it costly? You bet. Was it worth it? Not yet. But, it will be one day. Today, I am warming up to the idea of beginning from the small space my feet occupy. Begin right here. No past, no future. Just right here. Can you do that? I may be waiting for a sign. Wow! That sounded theatrical. Maybe even spiritual. I have often thought that there are things not understood that control our world. So many unknowns, so much at risk, so much to forget. But, what a prize waiting just ahead. I guess we all have our emotional chalk in hand. Ready to draw a starting line. Just in front of our toes.


k@kstepp.com

Founder, American Angel Works
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